To find Love
by muu-latte
Summary: neku and yoshi are in love. but there's two 'minor' problems. shonen-ai. mostly fluff. neku/yoshi josh . neku's POV. rated for cursing and mention of death.


**Hey! Muu here! I can't let Latte have all the fun, so I wrote a Neku/Yoshi too! This has SPOILERS or at least kind of. For this story I need you all to MAKE BELIEVE a few things with me.**

**Yoshiya is NOT the composer.**

**Yoshiya was NOT present during the final battle.**

**Yoshiya does NOT know as much as he actually does in the game.**

**And D) Yoshiya appears at the end in the real world.**

**Now that that's out of the way, we can move on.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own TWEWY.**

**NOTE: if you failed to read the make believe notes, please read them NOW. A second failure to do so may cause confusion.**

I knew the moment I saw this kid that this week was gonna be annoying. Unfortunately, we were already partners, so I was just gonna have to deal. There was a certain tone in his voice that just oozed spoiled rich kid. But again, just have to deal.

The way he talked was like as if he knew everything. Like he just wanted to make me look dumb. I had to push that to the back of my mind. But there was one thing I couldn't push out, and he did it constantly. Some of the comments he made were a little weird. After he finished telling me his fighting style, I distinctly remember him saying, "you watch my behind, I'll watch yours." I'm pretty sure the expression is, "you watch my back". It's like he was telling me to stare at his ass. Staring, that's another thing. He said something about blushing if I stared too long. He made so many of these comments. But at the time, I didn't understand what they really meant.

We spent a lot of time together, I mean, we were partners after all. But I never thought that it'd be enough time for him-for us- to even get that close. Man, I was wrong. On the sixth day-yesterday- Yoshi told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say then. I'm such an idiot. I knew how I felt, I still do. I wanted to tell him I loved him too, but I didn't know how. He pretended like it didn't bother him, but that look on his face-even if it was only there for a split second- said otherwise. I know I hurt him. It hurts me, too. But for some reason… even now, as he lies dying in my arms… I still can't say it.

I can feel the tears threatening to spill out. I won't cry. I _won't_.

"Neku," I hear him whisper, it's amazing he didn't just vaporize in that blast.

"Don't talk," I answer, my voice way less steady than I'd hoped.

"Neku," he whispers again, this time with that smug little smile I've grown so accustomed to. "Don't cry… Neku."

Of course, once he said that, it made it way harder for me not to. It's like saying 'don't look down'. I felt my breath catch in my throat as he reached a shaky, bloody hand to my cheek.

"Ne…ku, " he's breathing a lot harder now. "I… still… love you."

Damn, why'd he have to say that? I still can't answer him-why the hell not? That look again. I'm sorry, Yoshi…

"Neku," I can tell it's getting hard for him to keep his hand up. "Find me…"

"What do mean," I ask frantically, I heard my voice crack. "Yoshi?"

I grab his hand now, squeezing it gently. He's starting to fade. I hear him giggling weakly. That giggle… that I've grown so accustomed to.

"I let you… figure it out."

He begins to fade more, and I can't hold back my tears anymore. I hold him closer, resting my head on his chest as I just let them all go.

"Poor, Neku…"

That was the last thing I heard him say before fading completely. Disappearing… forever. I've never felt a pain like this. I clench my fists, and pound the ground like a small child. I can't take this pain. I can feel my hands bruising, so I finally stop. I look to the sky… and _scream_.

2 WEEKS LATER

The game's finally over, and we're all meeting for the first time in the real world. All of us except… him. I feel that pain even more just thinking about him. But I can't cry anymore… not since the night he died. I keep thinking about what he said though.

"Neku… find me…"

What did he mean? He's dead. I can't find him… unless he's telling me to wait 'till I die? That's too long! I can't take this. Everyone's staring at me now.

"Yo, Neku," must be Beat trying to tear me from my thoughts. "You aight?"

"Yeah, you seem pretty out of it," I guess Shiki wants to pull me away too.

"Neku, please tell us what's wrong," Rhyme… her too, huh?

"I'm fine," I lied, taking a deep breath. "Let's get going, huh?"

The others exchange glances. Guess I'm not very convincing.

"Well, I'm hungry, yo," his speech is so annoying. "Le's go eat."

"Yeah, that sounds-"

What was that? I think I just…

"Neku," I'm not sure who said it. "Neku? Yoo-hoo, Neku?"

There's a hand waving in front of my face. I grab it; it's blocking my view, dammit! No way… I have to be dreaming, right? Just now, I saw him. It was him I know it! Without saying anything I begin walking toward him. No doubt they're all following me- yep, just heard my name again. Oh well, doesn't matter right now. Crap, he's moving! I start running now, hoping to catch up with him. I weave between people, shouting quick excuse me's and apologies. He's going to Dogenzaka. I guess he's craving some Shio ramen? I'm close. I guess I should call him?

"Yoshiya!"

He stopped, thank goodness. I'm getting tired. Without thinking, I grab him, hugging him as tight as I could. I bet this shocked the others.

"U-um, do I… know you?"

You've gotta be kidding. I know this is him, he answered to his name.

"Yoshi, It's me," I say, hoping he's kidding.

"I'm sorry, you don't look familiar."

This isn't happening.

"Yoshi, come on," I'm starting to sound crazy.

"How do you know my name? You're not some kind of stalker are you?"

"No! It's not like that," this isn't happening. "You know who I am! I know you do!"

"Sorry, you've got the wrong guy."

As he turned to leave, I felt my heart begin ripping at the seams-this is too painful. My arm, acting on its own, reaches out, and grabs his wrist. Then words start coming out, like a storm. I keep doing things without thinking don't I? What am I saying anyway? I'm not even listening to myself.

"H-how do you know all that?"

Judging by the question and the look on his face, I just spilled a bunch of things about him that either he told me or I noticed.

"You are a stalker aren't you?"

He roughly jerks his hand away, and tries to leave again. I _can't_ lose him again!

"Yoshiya it's me, Neku," like this is gonna help. "You have to remember me!"

"Go away before I call the cops."

"Yoshiya… I… I love you, too," where'd that come from?

He turns around slowly.

"What did you say?"

I think he's genuinely freaked now. He's pulling out his phone, crap, he's gonna call the cops!

"I said I love you too," dammit Neku stop talking, just leave!

"What do you mean 'too'? I never-"

"Yes you did! Two weeks ago! You said you loved me, but I didn't answer-I should've," just walk away. "But I couldn't say it then."

He's backing up now, I should just leave.

"But now.. Now I can! Yoshi, I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you," I can't stop saying it.

Before he can put the phone to his ear, I knock it out of his hand. When did I get so close? I grab him, and pull him into a kiss. I really should think things through. He shoves me, hard, then tries to run, but before he gets to far, something else just forced itself passed my lips.

"I found you," huh? "Yoshiya… I found you."

When did I start crying? Why did he stop again? He turned. He's-he's crying, too?

"Neku…"

Does he remember now?

"Neku, I remember," well that answers that. "I remember! Neku!"

He runs into my open arms and we just hold each other, crying. He kisses me, and rests his forehead on mine.

"I'm glad you found me."

**The others must be so confused! This is, like, the deepest story I've ever written (minus the chees at the end, why are ending always cheesy?). Wow. When Latte read throught his she said "that's how his death should've gone." I hope you all enjoyed it. Please leave a review if you favorite it.**

**With love, Muu**


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